Distractions: If You Can’t Beat Them, Structure Them!

Make no mistake about it, we must all become entrepreneur-ish. No matter what your occupation may be, whether you are growing a business, or building a career, it’s crucial that you know how to and find the time to promote, market, and sell your professional brand. All I wanted to do was coach clients for career success. But to get a new business off the ground, I am (slowly) learning to become the Jill-of-all-trades and to wear all the hats as well as tough and durable running shoes as I’m chasing entrepreneurial success. Some days I only get to spend 20% of my time doing what I truly love and am passionate about. But on the positive side, no day is ever boring. Starting a business reminds me of my early days as a new parent – it takes a lot of work and sleepless nights. And you’ve got to learn to get things done among the dirty diapers. And oh, you have to like it for a very l-o-n-g time. Building a successful career is definitely a crazy, busy ride.

There’s a big difference between merely helping a baby survive and nurturing a baby to thrive. You have to be willing to put in a lot of love, energy, money, blood, sweat and tears to raise a healthy well-adjusted child. The same is true for building a healthy self-sustaining business, or establishing a successful career. Every endeavor involves daily routines and mundane tasks, which we must be willing to do with good grace as part of the experience. Being a professional means busy days when you are up to your neck in a whirlwind of activities. So what gives? Mark Suster advises we think of activities as a funnel. Ultimately, a business is only measured on the bottom-of-the-funnel, closing the deal: https://bothsidesofthetable.com/why-great-executives-avoid-shiny-objects-5a070bedb588.  And in career success terms, it means being the right kind of busy doing work that directly produces results.

But how do we avoid the shiny distractions: email, Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook, WhatsApp, Instagram, Pinterest, blog posts (have I missed anything)? These distractions are actually a knowledge professional’s bread and butter. We are bombarded with information every single minute of every single day. Accessing information is easy; the challenge is tuning in and selecting the right information. In the virtual playing field, our devices are our lifeline; our productivity is found in our distractions. And whether you are an entrepreneur chasing business or a professional building a successful career, productivity is crucial to survival.

In a world saturated with distractions, we need to master the skill of structuring these distractions. Start every day spending time creating a task list to plan for what needs to get done that day. Your day will become more manageable when you go into it with an action plan. As little as 30 minutes of planning can yield hours of productivity. It is almost a guarantee that your day will be filled with distractions and interruptions that will take up precious time. Plan for it and try to remain on task as much as possible. You will also find that despite your best efforts, your to-do list will never get any smaller. It’s a good thing! Here’s a look at 3 common distractions that can actually boost your productivity if you choose the right structure:

1. Living in the web

Don’t get lost in all the alerts. Use your smartphone smartly for work. There’s an app for just about anything: work management, time management, scheduling, note taking, etc. If you can name it, you can probably download it. Use the technology to get your work done efficiently finding information, getting answers, collaborating with others, and tracking essential sites for what’s trending. Make sure you fully utilize the potential of social media to leverage it and boost your performance and progress.

2. Working the inbox

Email is often cited as a major productivity killer. But the real issue is not email but rather how we manage our inbox. You’d be able to increase your productivity by checking your email in batches. Yes, it means overcoming the urge to stop everything you are doing to respond to messages as they come in. Additionally, using filters and automating tasks and processes can free up your time replacing unimportant tasks with value-added activities. And most importantly, the amount of emails you receive correlates to the number of those you send. You can significantly reduce the number of emails you receive by limiting and timing those you send out in the first place.

3. Mastering meetings

Were I to hazard a guess, I’d say that on average we spend over a third of our time at work in meetings and that over a third of these meetings are a waste of time. But even if my stats are completely off, I believe we could all agree that there are too many meetings consuming too much of our time yielding little tangible results. Now, for a business owner, any meeting is a good meeting. But in a business world where time is a precious resource, mastering the art of a meeting would give rise to greater workplace enthusiasm, creativity, and productivity. The key is in strategically managing the following five ingredients of an effective meeting: Purpose (clear objectives), Participants (roles & responsibilities), Prep work (resources & data), Process (agenda), and Product (commitments & deliverables.) Enforcing good meeting practices can turn meetings from a total time suck to a time well-spent.

Structuring each of the distractions listed above is doable if you break your day into chunks of time and schedule tasks to be completed in those chunks. Apply the 80/20 rule to your to-do list: 20% of your activities will yield 80% of your progress, so be sure to focus on the tasks that will move you closer to achieving your goals. Working hard is important, but knowing where to spend your time will determine the ultimate success of your efforts. As you set yourself up for success, identify the ways you work best and honor the habits that best work for you. Social media, email, and meetings are only problems if they are getting in the way of getting things done instead of enhancing your performance. It is up to you whether to be distracted or re-structured.

Raising Happy Children: Parenting Practices to Apply to Professional Growth

Often, people experience spillover of work problems into home life, or stress from personal issues affecting work performance. Thus, the coaching process is all-encompassing touching on every aspect of clients’ lives as they seek to set and achieve meaningful goals. One client shared how two simple parenting practices to help his family start and end each day more positively resulted in a positive spillover to his work interactions and job performance. It got me thinking how some core parenting practices we use to help children learn the skills they will need as they grow up, should be continuously applied to our own work.

If you ask parents what they want for their children, I’d wager that most would answer they want their children to be happy. Now, it’s been years since I read any parenting books, but I believe some of the same practices recommended to raise happy children (so that they grow up to be successful and accomplished adults, according to the books) should be applied to finding happiness and success at work. The truth is that taking care of ourselves as we manage high-stress, high-pressure, over-busy lives would enable us to then be available to take care of others; similar to putting on own oxygen mask before helping others if a plane loses cabin pressure. We are often told to connect with our inner child, but perhaps we’d be better served if we find our inner parent and apply the parenting practices that make children healthy, happy and successful to our own personal and professional growth. Here are 6 principles to continuously apply to our work lives:

1. Expect effort, not perfection

When children are expected to do their best (not be the best), they tend to be more motivated to try new things and experience joy in the process. This remains true as we transition into hard-working adults. We are more likely to step outside our comfort zone, embrace the unknown, and “give it a go” when we focus on best effort and excellence rather than short-term results and perfection. When we strive for excellence, we give our best effort and put in the hard work. It means success is measured by persistence, developing skills and making progress over time. It also implies failure is an inherent part of the process. Pursuing excellence is taking the fast road to success. Chasing perfection is a journey down a dead end street. Only when we learn to overcome failure we can experience career success every step of the way.

2. Play nice in the sandbox

To thrive in the corporate sandbox, we need follow the simple lessons learned in preschool: get along with others, play fair, don’t snatch and grab things, and do not kick dirt in other people’s faces. No one wants to play with an ill-tempered spoiled child who doesn’t know how to take turns or share. No professional is an island. Modern work life consists of interdependencies. Most jobs require teamwork and collaboration. Having good manners and great interpersonal skills determine whether people enjoy working with us, which in turn greatly impacts our performance, sphere of influence, and advancement. The ability to work well with others is key to career success.

3. Show compassion and empathy

Kindergarten often means the start of a new and bigger school. I remember our first back-to-school-night meeting in which one anxious parent asked what the school was doing to ensure the school was safe and to prevent bullying. The teacher responded citing the school’s zero tolerance policies. But then she insightfully added that parents are a child’s primary teachers in the way we show empathy and caring in our everyday life. She closed her answer saying that teaching children compassion is an investment that will repay itself over and over again. Empathy is a natural part of the human experience. Gone are the days of the cutthroat workplace. The real key to navigating both the triumphs and the challenges of building a successful career is empathy. Simply stated, empathy is putting oneself in another person’s shoes. It is about showing respect and the ability to connect with and relate to others. To succeed, we must master the art of building positive interpersonal relationships at work; to care about people and to handle relationships with tact and diplomacy.

4. Lighten up

Oh the things we used to do to get our kids to giggle and laugh - all the silly antics, funny faces, peekaboo, “Knock Knock” jokes, and teen comedy films. How we wanted to hear them laugh and enjoy those moments of pure joy. A sense of humor definitely brightens a home and family life. Using age-appropriate humor and laughter is a great way to connect with children and get through the rough patches. I firmly believe that a family that laughs together stays together. And I’ve also come to believe through anecdotal observations that children with a good sense of humor and a positive attitude tend to make friends easily and be more popular, which remains true in the workplace. People want to work with people they like. Having a good-natured attitude, being a good sport, and displaying a good sense of humor are all crucial skills in building and maintaining rapport with others. And as discussed above, building positive workplace relationships is vital for career success.

5. Take ownership and responsibility

As a parent I often wondered whether I was teaching my children the important stuff; in particular finding the right balance: helping without enabling and loving without spoiling. Children learn to take responsibility when we stop over-managing and empower them to do the age-appropriate things they can and should be doing for themselves. It’s the only way to really give them the necessary life skills to make their way in the world on their own merit. We’ve all been told it’s important to “be professional” in order to have a successful career. But what does it mean? At the core, professionalism is about taking ownership and responsibility for knowledge, mastery of skills, attitude, performance, and results. Taking ownership means taking the initiative. Taking responsibility means holding ourselves accountable for delivering on commitments and achieving results. Our daily actions pave the path to our success.

6. Schedule downtime into your day

Any parent would agree that napping is important for young children. There’s nothing worse than a tired, whiny, and cranky toddler. Like children, adults also need down time to recharge and reboot. All too often, downtime gets de-prioritized falling by the wayside. We need rest time to boost our productivity. Like any other muscle, our brain tires from repeated strenuous mental activity. Taking a break from our work, even if just to surf the net and watch funny videos, can give our brain a much needed break to relax our mind. Taking a break following focused concentration can help us gain a fresh perspective on complex work problems.
 
Perhaps one of the most astounding thing about being a parent was all the things my mother had taught me (and I ignored growing up) that came back to me and started to make great sense, especially the reminder that “somewhere, someone else is happy with less than you have.” This is one of the greatest truths. As we strive to set and achieve goals, we need to remember that happiness and fulfillment in life isn't achieved by having what we want but rather by appreciating what we do have. To quote Dale Carnegie: “Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get.”

• What would your choices be if you treated yourself as a loved, adored, and cherished child?
• What decisions would make your inner parent proud?
• How can you become fully invested in your own success to thrive and flourish at work?

 

 

When Life Gives You Lemons The Sequel - Handle It Like a Great CEO!

I can’t help but follow the social media bashing of United Airlines; especially the slew of new slogans to replace “fly the friendly skies.” The best I have seen are “putting the hospital in hospitality,” “we’ll drag you all over the world,” and “United now offering both red-eye and black-eye flights.” Would be funny if not a very unsettling true story. Talk about big sour lemons! Now worse than the unfortunate incident exhibiting horrifically bad judgment in dragging a paying customer off a plane is the fact that it took the United Airlines CEO, Oscar Munoz, three attempts to offer a sincere and compassionate apology. Yet another example of how one can be legally right yet morally wrong.

I’d feel remiss if I didn’t continue to elaborate more on the topic of getting through the lemon times in both our professional and personal lives. There are days when life throws big lemons at our head full force knocking the wind right out of us. High pressure stressful situations often lead to tunnel vision and blindly following “established procedures.” At such times, we need to act like a great CEO and emulate those rare leaders who possess the hard-to-find qualities and capacity to act boldly and show grace under fire.

Most days when we are faced with the unexpected and undesirable negative situations we can muster the energy and inner resources needed to make lemonade and move forward. But sometimes we just want to sit there staring at the lemon feeling sorry for ourselves. I have never subscribed to the idea that “life/God will not give more than we can handle.” In my work with people, I have witnessed times when life gives out more than a person can handle alone: loss, grief, and a lot of pain (physical or mental.) When the pain is so intense it exceeds our resources for coping, it’s time to seek professional help. In the face of highly stressful negative pressures, acting like a great CEO means having the mental strength and capacity to use problem-solving strategies and utilize the higher order thinking and coping skills necessary to overcome adversity.

No CEO has a lemon-free path to success. Many things go wrong along the way. They operate within a business environment characterized by extremely high-pressure, volatile market conditions, and frequent sudden changes. At times, the choice is between bad, very bad, and plain horrible. Great CEOs roll with the punches. They are those who lead their companies to success managing the negatives beyond their control. While great CEOs are highly competent in soliciting input and gathering information, ultimately, they are completely alone in making the final decision, and they are the ones to be held accountable for the consequences. In the HBR article "Three Traits Every CEO Needs" Justin Menkes lists three traits that CEOs need to thrive in today’s tough business environment.

You are the CEO of your life. How are you performing as the CEO of your company, the captain of your ship? Are you taking charge of directing your home and professional life when managing stressful work or personal situations to reach the highest possible success? We can’t control what happens to us, but we have the power to define how we respond to things. Develop these three traits to be successful: Be –

1. Realistically Optimist: maintain a positive outlook within reason. Set and purse big goals but be prepared to deal with the challenges and the difficulties on the road ahead. I’ve had ups and downs in my career, and one of the most important lessons that I’ve learned is to face my fears and believe that a better future is possible if I keep trying. When dealing with real crises, the best approach is to maintain composure. Panic will distract you from seeing the opportunities right in front of you. And there are opportunities and choices even in difficult situations.

“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” ~ Viktor Frankl

2. True to Purpose: find a clear purpose to which to commit. You need to believe in what you do to withstand all adversity and hurdles and to triumph over hard times. When you have a clear purpose, you find the strength to handle the rough patches and push forward to continue the course.

“Working hard with purpose is what separates the good from the great.” ~Thad Matta

3. A Great Problem-Solver: when things get complicated, simplify them. In stressful times, we tend to experience brain overload, which makes it difficult to figure out the steps to handle the issues and fix the problem. The key is to be orderly and systematic in our thinking. Great leaders have a keen ability to simplify complex ideas and issues to resolve difficult situations. They are able to break down complex problems into manageable components.

“Great leaders are almost always great simplifiers, who can cut through argument, debate and doubt, to offer a solution everybody can understand.” ~ Colin Powell

How is your company doing? Are you being the best CEO you can be to handle any lemons with grace and achieve top level success?

The Festival of Freedom: Principles of Freedom and Humanity

The Jewish holiday of Passover begins today at sundown. It is a holiday that commemorates the Exodus of the Israelites from Egypt thousands of years ago. In the retelling of the story of the Exodus, the text that sets forth the ritual of the service instructs: “Remember this day, on which you went out of Egypt.” On Passover, every year, in every generation, and every location around the world, Jewish people observing the holiday are asked to regard themselves as if they had personally left Egypt out of slavery and into freedom. There is a profound truth beyond the Jewish experience as we ask ourselves “what does freedom mean to me?” personally and on a larger scale, in our community and world-wide.

The gift of freedom comes with the responsibility to work for the freedom of others. True freedom lies not only in the pursuit of our own rights but also in fighting for the freedoms of others who are denied them and living in a way that is respectful towards all people of different backgrounds and beliefs. Freedom and compassion go hand in hand. As our own personal freedom increases, our capacity for compassion should grow outward into the world. We can be truly free when we act with compassion and generosity toward others. In choosing compassion as our compass, we enrich the human experience.

“The greatness of humanity is not in being human, but in being humane” ~ Mahatma Gandhi.

And then, of course, there’s freedom on an individual level. Freedom means different things to different people, but at the core, it’s having the autonomy and capacity for self-expression and making individual choices. Freedom and choice go hand in hand. With the freedom to make choices, we need to be willing to accept the responsibility for our decisions, actions, and outcomes. It’s important to recognize that what is possible, may not necessarily come easy to us. Every new possibility leads to incredible opportunities as well as some tough challenges. Freedom is the ability to embrace the challenges along our journey to keep moving forward, to keep evolving and to become better people.

“Freedom is not overcoming what you think stands in your way. It is understanding that what is in your way is part of the way.” ~ Guy Finley.

In applying the concept of freedom to our work life, we need to ask ourselves: “what does career freedom mean to me?”

On an individual level it means owning our career, making sure we are in the driver’s seat taking responsibility for our professional development. Career freedom requires a proactive strategy to establish and achieve professional dreams and goals. This is an ongoing process of evaluating what we love, what we want, where we are and where we are heading managing our career every step of the way freeing ourselves of any limiting situations and achieving greater professional self-actualization. To achieve career freedom always remain true to who you are at your best. A brand is a promise of an experience, what is the experience of people working with you?

If you have any direct reports, I hope you ask yourself what freedom means in managing people. At the core it is about understanding that leadership has nothing to do with a position, title, seniority, authority or pay grade, and everything to do with interpersonal relationship catering for the freedoms and needs of others. As an HR leader and coach, I believe that today’s biggest business problems are people challenges: how to attract top talent, how to engage and motivate people? How to increase productivity? How to encourage creativity and innovation? How to facilitate collaboration? How to build a strong positive culture? I also believe that the answer lies in giving up control and giving others expressive freedom to use their talent and excel at their work. You are a leader when you offer people the freedom of choice to fully contribute to the collective knowledge, experience and success of the tem and the company.

In closing, I’d like to quote Rosa Parks: “I believe we are here on the planet earth to live, grow up and do what we can to make this world a better place for all people to enjoy freedom.”

 May this festival of freedom bring peace and freedom to all of our homes in every aspect of our life and in all that we do!

 

What now? When Life given You Lemons

I grew up in a loving but stoic family. The core guiding principles of my childhood were to grow up to be a good, hard working person and to accept any disappointments without complaint. My siblings and I were pushed to “make something of ourselves.” Yet, to always plan for the worst-case scenario, to keep expectations low in case things didn’t work out. My maternal grandmother was the dominant figure in the entire family. She used to end every discussion about future plans with the Yiddish proverb "Man plans, God laughs". Try and make plans but always expect the “Oy Vey” moments, those times when things do not go according to plan and you find yourself dealing with life’s little annoyances. You see, my grandmother believed it was all small stuff. She used to say that if all of our neighbors laid out their problems on their respective front yards, we’d look at them all and end up taking back our own problems and disappointments.

The “Oy Vey” moments, the "Woe is me!” moments, have three elements:

1. They are unexpected
2. They are unwanted
3. They are unpleasant

These moments suck, but they're a fact of life. Disappointments are unavoidable. Tenacity to overcome them is a necessary coping skill. Our journey is a long series of small and big(ger) challenges with many moments of joy and hopefully moments of achievement and satisfaction, too. The ability to deal with the irritating events is incredibly important as we juggle busy careers and busy lives. When “Plan A” doesn’t work, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet. We need to keep trying.

We are surrounded by people whose life mission seems to be to upset or annoy us: the desk-hoverer who wouldn’t go away, the boss who expects an immediate response no matter what, the co-worker who always clips his nails at his desk. And, of course, we all have those days when things just keep going from bad to worse: we are running late, there’s road work, we get stuck in a huge traffic jam, we can’t find anywhere to park, and when we finally make our way into the office, coffee in hand, the cup lid collapses spilling coffee all over. We all have these moments when we look up in frustration crying out loud: “Why is this happening to me?”

We generally do not respond well to life’s unexpected curveballs. Rather than hit them out of the park we tend to react and blow a gasket. To thrive, we need to develop better strategies to work through frustrations. Even if you cannot hit the curveball out of the park, you can certainly push back and find workable solutions. Don’t just lie down and take whatever life throws at you, find a way to push back. Here are 4 self- empowering steps to deal with life’s little annoyances when you encounter them.

1. Wallow: Self Pity
 

• Take 60 seconds to embrace the frustration: yell, vent, curse, shed a few tears, and jump up and down or sideways. Whatever works!
• Then Smile. It is said that the best revenge is to smile and move on. When we smile, it triggers positivity in the brain. It is the best way to reboot, reset, and restart.
• Dig deep and look for the positive. When you don’t feel like being positive, it is probably the time when you need it the most. A positive attitude could make the biggest difference.

2. Reflect: Self-check

Engage the brain moving from reaction to response.

• What is the challenge?
• What’s stressing you out about the situation?
• What’s the worst-case scenario of this situation?

3. Fix It: Self-reliance

Focus on the things that can be done to salvage the situation, take control through choiceful actions.

• What actions can help mitigate or solve the problem?
• What is the best way forward?

4. Learn: Self-knowledge

There’s a lesson in every experience. We become wiser by what we learn from it.

• What have I learned about the situation and myself?
• How can I turn it to my advantage?

Don’t confuse the path with the destination. Just because it’s raining now and the path is muddy, doesn’t mean you aren’t headed for clear blue skies.

“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.” Viktor Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning.