Decision-making Step 1: Self-Assessment

While there are no hard and fast rules for decision-making, following the 5-step process outlined in my last blog (The Quick Decision-making Guide) will help you make tough decisions better and faster.

From the moment we wake up in the morning until we fall asleep at night, we are faced with countless decisions, most of which are routine and relatively inconsequential. Those decisions fall into our easy choices category such as which oatmeal brand to buy. However, there are choices that can potentially take us to a whole new path. These types of transformational decisions require making changes affecting not only our life but other people’s lives as well. We’ve all heard the motivational quote that every success starts with the decision to try. And the decision to try starts with a choice to change the status quo, to bridge the gap between what is and what needs to be. While the choices are hard, these “fork in the road” moments are a gift. They are precious opportunities for us to uncover new things about ourselves as we contemplate choices and new possibilities.

The first step in the decision-making process starts as soon as you realize that you need to make an important decision that is likely to change your life. You will then need to identify the nature and purpose of the decision in order to resolve a specific problem. Once the problem is accurately defined, the following three questions should yield a better understanding of the situation and increase self-awareness:

1. Why should the problem be solved? How important is it to solve the problem?
2. What is the opportunity?
3. What is the risk?

Awareness doesn’t mean we necessarily know where things are going, but rather that we want things to be better than they are today. Choices are about actively selecting between alternatives, making the best investment of our resources such as time, money, and energy to get to where we want to be. To do so, we need to search inside ourselves and get clear on what is meaningful and important to us.

Being at crossroads can be stressful and confusing. As a career coach, I’ve learned that clients who report being “stuck” and unable to make a decision often struggle with articulating what they really want and thus can’t pursue any options because none “feel right.” The heart wrenching deliberation is typically a sign that the true desire has not been addressed. So when you find yourself “stuck” as you think about what’s not working for you, be sure to also think about what you really want, what really appeals to you. If you dig deeper and do some internal excavating, you will get a clear view, and the right path would slowly appear.

But as soon as we get clarity we need to get over a major fear factor: uncertainty. When we have all the facts and take little to no risk, there’s no need for making a decision. We basically need to follow a proven and reliable operating procedure and keep walking the beaten path. Making big important transformative decisions involves taking a risk, a leap of faith, choosing to change without fully knowing where the road will take us or what the consequences will be. Fear of making the “wrong” decision or failing to achieve a desired goal is the enemy of pursuing dreams. Through my work as a career coach, I have become intimately familiar with avoidance, procrastination, and mind-numbing paralysis.

Our emotions can be a great asset in keeping us safe. We can count on our automatic responses any time we face danger. This has probably saved us over the years when slamming on the breaks or ducking to avoid danger. But because emotions are our instinctive protective response, they are fallible. Fear can also keep us from daring to try new things. Fear is a sign that something important is at stake. Address the fear head-on and move forward - see my blog from Feb. 9 "Is Fear Holding You Back?".

But change is hard, and I’ve learned that at times there’s a disconnect between what we say we want and the effort we put into making it happen. Identifying and stating our desires may not be easy, but commitment to action is even harder. Thus, step one is crucial for the success of the decision-making process. It calls for an honest self-reflection not only about what we want but also about the possibility of changing, whether we are truly willing to change our behaviors and habits. Would the long-term positives outweigh the short-term cost? When faced with a potentially transformational choice, define which path will help you live more authentically. To move forward, you need to find clarity on your long-term aspirations.

So where do you start? Start by writing about the decision you need to make. Define the problem. Identify the gap between the current situation and the ideal situation.

When you are ready to confront the problem and make a decision, use the following 2 techniques to better assess the situation:

1. The Inquisitive Child Technique (the Six Sigma 5 Whys tool): start by creating a clear problem statement, and then work backwards asking “why” until you reach the root cause of the problem.

Example:
 
Problem statement: I was passed over for a promotion.

• Why? I am often late for work.
• Why? I get up too late.
• Why? I don’t sleep well.
• Why? I am stressed about work.
• Why? My boss always criticizes me.
• Why? I sometimes make sloppy mistakes.
• Why? I hate what I do.

2. The Imaginary Friend Technique: ask yourself what advice you’d give a friend in your situation.

These two techniques work well together: first identify the root cause problem at the core of the decision you need to make, and then start to problem-solve as you contemplate the advice you’d give someone else in a similar situation.

Successful decision-making involves a deep self-assessment to better understanding strengths, interests, drivers, values, and personal traits. The following are online self-assessment tools my clients have found helpful over the years. Please note: assessment tools work best when administered and interpreted by a certified professional in the relevant tool. However, the free online versions can provide meaningful insights.

1. The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI)

This is one of the most well-known assessment tools. The 93 questions help identify personality preferences to inform decisions toward desired outcomes. This one is $49.95. But there are many other options.

http://www.mbtionline.com/

Free Tools

1. The Big Five Assessment

This tool consists of 50 items you must rate on a five point scale to identify your work and learning preference out of five personality traits.

http://personality-testing.info/tests/IPIP-BFFM/

2. The Keirsey Temperament Sorter -II (KTS®-II)

This tool contains 71 questions intended to measure how you communicate and what your actions you tend to take.

http://www.keirsey.com/sorter/register.aspx

3. The MAPP Career Assessment

The free version of this career test has been taken by more than 8 million people around the world. The purpose of this tool is to identify true career motivations (what you like to do) and top vocational areas (jobs that might be a good fit.)
You may choose to upgrade to other MAPP Career Packages.

http://www.assessment.com/
 
4. MyPlan.com

Here you’ll find a variety of career assessment tests. The Career Values Assessment Test is free. It can help uncover what is really important to you at work. The Career Personality Test, Career Interest Inventory, and Career Skills Profiler are available at under $10 per test. The complete package can be purchased for $19.95. You would get a list of jobs rank-ordered to match your style.

http://www.myplan.com

Self-assessment is the first and most important step in the decision-making and any planning process. Ultimately, the knowledge you gain through self-assessment will be most helpful in guiding your choices and personal and professional development. When you complete this step, you should be ready to move to step 2 and reflect on your ideal future outcome and set your goal.

The Quick Decision-making Guide: A 5-Step Process

In my practice, I help clients make important career decisions. Effective decision-making skills are essential for career success. Yet, while many valuable life skills are taught in high school and college, teaching decision-making skills is often neglected. How many of us can say we’ve been taught decision-making principles and have been given tools and best practices as we were facing difficult life or career decisions?

Decision-making is a thriving area of research, and its concepts can be taught. But effective decision-making, like any other skill, requires active and continuous practice. We need to look at our own decision-making process, get familiar with our bias and fear, and learn from our experience to hone the skills and refine our process. We make hundreds of decisions each day. But when facing high stakes situations, making decisions is never easy. There are three key ingredients to decision-making: choices, possible consequences, and actions.

While there are no hard and fast rules for decision-making, the following 5 steps can provide an effective and timely decision-making process.

Step 1: Self-assessment – when you know something’s got to change and you need to make a decision.

• Key question: What is not working well for me at work or in my life?

Step 2: Set your goal – reflect about the ideal future outcome.

• Key question: How would I like the situation to be?

Step 3: Identify the alternatives – explore your options.

• Key Question: What are my possible choices?

Step 4: Weigh your options – consider the consequences.

• Key Question: What are the likely outcomes of each of the choices?

Step 5: Make a choice – commit to action.

• Key Question: What SPECIFIC actions will I commit to?

Taking action is often the overlooked ingredient for professional and personal growth. If no new action is taken, a decision hasn’t really been made, and no significant change will occur. Progress is impossible without change.

Be sure to check out my next blogs for more on this topic. 

Celebrating a New Year for Trees: What a Tree Can Teach Us

Let us celebrate life, growth, and the beauty of the turning seasons. And let’s remember to keep our heart and mind open to allow good things to come in. As the Chinese proverb goes: “If you keep a green tree in your heart, perhaps the singing bird will come.” The Jewish holiday Tu B’shevat begins today at sundown. It is a holiday that marks the birthday of the trees. To get into the holiday spirit, I’d like to share the poem Advice from a Tree, which is one of my favorite poems. I received it beautifully printed and framed as a gift, and it seems to captures all the advice I’ll ever need as learned from the wisdom of a tree.

Advice from a Tree

Dear Friend,
Stand Tall and Proud
Sink your roots deeply into the Earth
Reflect the light of a greater source
Think long term
Go out on a limb
Remember your place among all living beings
Embrace with joy the changing seasons
For each yields its own abundance
The Energy and Birth of Spring
The Growth and Contentment of Summer
The Wisdom to let go of leaves in the Fall
The Rest and Quiet Renewal of Winter
Feel the wind and the sun
And delight in their presence
Look up at the moon that shines down upon you
And the mystery of the stars at night.
Seek nourishment from the good things in life
Simple pleasures
Earth, fresh air, light
Be content with your natural beauty
Drink plenty of water
Let your limbs sway and dance in the breezes
Be flexible
Remember your roots
Enjoy the view!
~ Ilan Shamir

Let us celebrate life, growth, and the beauty of the turning seasons. And let’s remember to keep our heart and mind open to allow good things to come in. As the Chinese proverb goes: “If you keep a green tree in your heart, perhaps the singing bird will come.” 

Is Fear Holding You Back? 4 Steps to Befriend Your Inner Demons & Take the Leap

What are you seeking to accomplish in your career? What big goals do you wish to achieve? What is holding you back from these professional goals and dreams? Are you stuck tangled up in the clutches of fear? Often, when it comes to chasing our goals, we allow fear to keep us from taking risks and taking the leap. If you were fearless, what would you make happen in your career or in your life?

In all the years I’ve spent helping people set and achieve goals, I have only very rarely encountered a lazy person. Sure, there are times when people get lazy and don’t get things done, but when it comes to BHAGs (Big Hairy Audacious Goals), it is typically fear that’s the root of procrastination and inaction.

Fear is our own inner demon waiting to rear its ugly head and speak to us in a constant inner chatter narrating our deepest shame, guilt, and insecurities as soon as we feel the winds of change around us and at the mere sight of new possibilities. Fear will use any opportunity to claim our attention to alert us to real and perceived threats and dangers. Now, even when the threats are real, fear is a choice, as are hope and optimism.

When we sense a threat, our brain reacts instantly, and we tend to respond in fight, flight, or avoidance mode. When we see a dragon we can run away screaming, decide to slay the dragon and fight it to the bitter end, or freeze into inaction burying our head in the sand. But there is a more constructive way to face our fear – befriend it. Here’s how:

1.    Identify the need

What do you want to achieve, and what is important to you about fulfilling this goal? Is it really a “must have” in your life? What are your success criteria? What would you gain by achieving your goal? What would you need to change? What would you need to give up or lose in order to achieve this goal? Are you willing to pay the price?

2.    Identify the fear

We experience fear when something is important and the stakes are high. Fear focuses our attention on problems, anything and everything that can go wrong. Fear is a great teacher. When we name our fear and recognize our avoidance behaviors, we can use fear as a springboard for action. As Yoda says: “named must your fear be before banish it you can.” Get specific about what you're afraid of. What is holding you back? What choices are you avoiding? What are you not ready to change, yet?

3.    Befriend the fear

Remember that being afraid of things going wrong is the wrong way to make things right. Reframe each fear and re-focus attention on solutions and finding a way to make your dreams come true. Challenges and failure are a part of every success story. Turn your fear into power channeling its energy into positive actions. Embrace fear and turn it into an incredible opportunity to challenge and stretch yourself. Flex your resourcefulness muscles and inspire yourself to grow in new ways; it’s a surefire path to success in all areas of your professional and personal life.

4.    Work with the fear

The path to success is action. Now that you’ve named and befriended your fear, proceed to name the choices that will help you reach your goal. Make your fear work for you in creating a sound action plan. Consider the road blocks and identify the steps that will get you closer to your desired future. Do the work. Hard work is not a guarantee of success. Things will either work out, or they won’t, but on the path to success no effort goes to waste. At the very least, it’s good practice. Success comes in many forms. Sometimes you achieve, but you are always learning something from everything you go through. Don’t give up; you may be closer to your goal than you think.

Befriending fear is not about denying the possibility of failure; rather it is about knowing failure is par for the course and trusting that no matter what, things will get better, that we will come out victorious. To befriend and dance with fear means finding a way to achieve the things we thought we couldn’t do. 

Are you a SMART Leader?

Defining a manager is fairly straightforward: a manager manages a group of tasks or people, and often both. But who is leader?

“If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more, do more and become more, you are a leader” ~ John Quincy Adams

Leadership has nothing to do with a position, title, seniority, authority or pay grade. It’s all about having a clear sense of purpose and being a positive influence. We all have opportunities to exert positive influence over situations and to change things for the better in ways large and small. Simply stated, leadership is a mindset of wanting to make a difference. In people’s terms it’s about wanting to help others become better and grow, seeing talent and ability in others and bringing it out of them, and encouraging others to excel at what they are doing. You are a leader when you are excited to be a part of another person’s journey.

SMART leaders are those who have realized that leadership is about people, not the bottom line. They have mastered the art of building positive interpersonal relationships at work. They care about people, they prioritize people, and they know how to motivate people. At times they keep ahead of the team leading from the front, at other times, they direct from behind letting the strongest team members push ahead, but they always lead from within, from the heart and in the middle. They bring people together, handle relationships with tact and diplomacy, and hold things together.

Five things SMART leaders do: They

SERVE

In the past decade, the term “servant leader” has come into common use signifying the paradigm shift from authoritarian leadership to a participative leadership. Servant leaders actively solicit participation and input, and they go above and beyond to help and support others. SMART leaders always remember that they are serving those they lead, not the other way around. They encourage others to build a culture in which people set aside self-serving behaviors in favor of serving a common agenda.

To serve others is to always be asking “What can I do for you?”

MOTIVATE

Motivational leadership inspires others to perform at their best by giving them a compelling vision and a sense of purpose. The key is to motivate individuals, to get to know each person and find out what makes them tick. People are more engaged and committed to consistent action when they understand why their work is important and how it fits within the bigger picture.

To motivate others is to always be asking “How can I make your work more meaningful?”

AFFIRM

It is human nature to want recognition, praise, and appreciation. And when people feel that their efforts are appreciated and valued, they are likely to go the extra mile. Affirmation needs to be personal and specific. SMART leaders are good observers noticing everything that’s happening around them and recognizing the little things that make things run smoothly. They acknowledge and recognize those who positively contribute to the team and thus set the standard of which all others should aspire to become.

To affirm others is to always be asking “How can I make you feel like a valuable contributor?”

RESPECT all people

Every person has value. All employees deserve to be treated with dignity and civility at their place of work. Team work is grounded in respect. In a respectful environment people are more likely to work harder to accomplish shared goals they believe in. With years of experience conducting employee engagement surveys, I can confidently say that respectful treatment of all employees is one of the most important factors employees list as contributing to job satisfaction. To show respect means to value a person’s perspective, ideas, feelings, time, and privacy.

To respect others is to ask for their input and listen to what they have to say.

TAKE RESPONSIBILITY

At the end of the day, leadership is measured by results. Leadership is about taking responsibility for the quality and timeliness of outcomes. SMART leaders take initiative, yet make decisions carefully and responsibly. They create a work environment in which accountability is a standard operating procedure by setting meaningful goals and measurable metrics. But they also know that leadership isn’t about blame. They are quick to pass the credit and recognize the team’s efforts when things go right, and they step up and claim responsibility when things go wrong. They then lead and direct the focus and efforts to moving forward and fixing the problems.

To take responsibility is to always be asking “How can I make things better?”

SMART leaders aspire to make a difference in other people’s lives by using all the resources available to them in every possible way to help them shine their brightest in achieving great things. Step up and take the reigns as a leader at work and in life and become the kind of leader that people would want to follow.